<p><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I had to attend a short seminar on manual handling. It came under the heading of health and safety at work. Employers have a duty of care to their staff and part of that duty includes proper training in many areas, including manual handling.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">I&rsquo;ve known Mike, the trainer, for about 4 years, and my first question was, &ldquo;Does this session include tips I might pass on to encourage the missus to do some manual handling, only she keeps telling me we&rsquo;re too old for that sort of thing.&rdquo;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Sadly, it did not. It took the form of a video presentation, a lecture from Mike, and then we had to pick up a box put it on the table, then take it off the table and put it back on the floor.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">It seemed to me that by the time we were through, the box would be in a state of confusion, now knowing whether it was supposed to be on the table or the floor. The union called an immediate work to rule in support of the box&rsquo;s demand for a proper job description and allocation of workspace. In addition there were health and safety issues concerning the box which could be injured if some clumsy berk (i.e. me) dropped it. On a show of hands the motion was defeated on the grounds that the box had consistently refused to join the union. The box has now been sent to Coventry, which is a bit unfortunate, because it was addressed to Carlisle.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">While all this was going on, I pointed out to Mike, that if I followed lifting procedures and bent at the knee, keeping my back straight, I would never get up again because my knees would come out in sympathy with the box. My pleas fell on deaf ears. I had to lift the box onto the table, then drop it on the floor.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">The best bit of the morning was the video presentation. The company had gone to a lot of trouble producing this half hour video, and it was worth every penny. The guy lifting and demonstrating handling techniques really knew his stuff. For example, when he came across a 49kg parcel on the upper shelf of a warehouse rack, he showed us how to pull it towards ourselves, tilt and take the weight naturally, as it slid off the shelf. My only question was, which brainless prat put a 49kg parcel on the upper shelf in the first place.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">Then he was working in the back of a van showing us how to put parcels on the conveyor for offloading. His little workspace soon got filled so he started the conveyor to take the parcels away. The only trouble was he started it in the wrong direction and two of the parcels almost fell off onto his foot.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">But the best bit of the video was the animation, which showed us the human spine and how easily it can be damaged by twisting and compressing the discs in directions they were not designed for. It likened the discs to a jam doughnut.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">&nbsp;</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB">A JAM DOUGHNUT?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Now I know why I have so much trouble with my back. Over the years the cream has clotted and the jam has set solid.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> </xml><![endif]--> <!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></p> <p>I'm in bad mood. Not because I'm back from holiday. I vented my spleen on the travel agent this morning for that cock-up <em>(details probably tomorrow) </em>but because I've just watched Dale Winton's lottery show, and frankly, the level of learning of the contestants is as astonishing as it is bad. Note, I use the word learning, not intelligence.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>There was a young woman who did not know that the full title of Dickens' novel was not Oliver, as in the Lionel Bart musical, but Oliver Twist. A 19 year old barman who assumed that Henry Morgan the buccaneer, was a former Prime Minister <em>(doesn't' he sell Morgan's Rum in his bar?)</em> Another youngster had never heard of Sir Frank Whittle or Barnes Wallis, and a 40-year old who assumed first that King Lear was not a mediaeval drama, and then decided that, "A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse," was said by Henry V and not Richard III.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>There may be some justification in blaming the education system, except that I have a daughter and two sons around the 40-year-old age bracket, all three of whom would know the answer to each of those questions <em>(I don't know about my youngest son, because he's not talking to me or any of the family.)</em> My wife's nephew also has a stepdaughter aged 22 who can reel off Shakespeare for fun.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>These are trivia questions, granted, but they are steeped in English history, which all of us should be acquainted with. When I went to school <em>(not quite slate and chalk, but certainly six of the best for thinking when you should have been listening)</em> Oliver Twist was compulsory reading. I hated every word of it, but I could still give you a run down of the plot and the key characters. Major Shakespeare works were also compulsory <em>(I played Cassius in Julius Caesar and I never did get to say, &lsquo;float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.')</em> Also obligatory were the histories of men like Morgan, Drake and Raleigh, and the great British engineers and inventors were not skipped. When lessons were through you were expected to know of men like Telford, Brunel, Wallis, Whittle, Cockerel, Alan Turing and John Logie Baird.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>In my infuriated opinion, those last two, the one who invented the square-eyed monster, the other considered the father of modern computing, who have much to answer for. Today's youngsters spend too much time watching dross on TV, or surfing wiki to nick essays for homework, that they don't have the time to learn.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>But then, blaming Turing and Baird for today's dumbing down is a bit like blaming Einstein and Rutherford for Hiroshima.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>These contestants may argue, "Who needs to know about Frank Whittle and Shakespeare." My answer is simple.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>You do. If you had, you'd have gone home with a cut of forty grand.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> </xml><![endif]--> <!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></p> <p>I've always been fascinated by the paranormal. UFOs, ghosts and things that go bump in the night. And I don't mean banks crashing on the Nikkei while we're all asleep.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>To me, it's all good fun. I freely admit that I don't know what happens after death and I'm in no rush to find out. I don't know if the inhabitants of the planets orbiting Sirius are visiting earth, but if they are, they must be a gang of sad sacks. With an entire universe at your disposal who wants to come to this sorry little speck of dust? It's like taking a week's holiday and going to Accrington.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>As a novelist, the paranormal gives me great scope. Whether ghosts exist or not is irrelevant. They do in my world. Whether UFOs really are nuts and bolts machines full of aliens doesn't matter to me. They are what I make of them in my novels.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>So a few years ago, I published a novel entitled The Haunting of Melmerby Manor. It's still available from Virtual Tales. I was never happy with the finished product, and efforts to write a sequel have foundered. Still I persevered and showed it all to a publisher a few months back. He came back to me, saying no thanks, but unusually for a publisher, he pointed out what he felt was wrong with the project. It couldn't make its mind up whether it was a whodunit, a paranormal comedy, or a supernatural thriller.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>I mentioned it to Greg McQueen at Big Bad Media, and he suggested I go back to the drawing board and redraft is as a series of young adult novels involving those perennial favourites of young adults ... ghosts. No sex, because young adults aren't interested in sex, are they?</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Aren't they?</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Then how come we have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe?</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>I'm digressing into politics. Let's stick to fiction, (although admittedly, there's not always a lot of difference.)</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>So it's back on the drawing board. Notwithstanding the fact that I hate teenagers and never even thought of writing for them, I'm having a bash so watch this space.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Me? Writing for young adults?&nbsp; I'll be listening to Eminem and Kylie next.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> </xml><![endif]--> <!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></p> <p>Today appears to be the big day for announcements, so I'll make my announcement up front.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p><em><strong>I'm fed up!!!</strong></em></p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Having got that out of the way, here are the other announcements.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>I mentioned yesterday that I'd done an interview with Irish author, Don Booker. Well that's up an available on his blog at <a href="http://fbooker.blogspot.com/2010/08/author-in-zone-david-robinson.html">http://fbooker.blogspot.com/2010/08/author-in-zone-david-robinson.html</a></p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>It rambles a bit, but so do I ... mind, it is me talking so ... well you get the picture.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>I'm about the eighth author Don has interviewed and some of these people have really interesting points of view on the writing life and publishing process.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>The one piece of advice I can give you is make a cup of tea in advance. My interview is so riveting, you won't have time while you're reading it. It's true. My dog couldn't take his eyes off the screen. Mind you, I was working my way though a pork pie at the time, which may have influenced the dog.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Check out Don's blog. He's a man with something to say.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>The second announcement concerns Big Bad Media. I keep prattling about them and people going to the site then coming back and saying, "there's nothing there other than this video of a bloke's head exploding."</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>In response to this I say, "What do you expect for free."</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Greg McQueen, the multimedia wizard behind BBM wanted me to star in that role, but I declined. I need my head during the football season to work out my bets. The missus, always one to takes everyone's side but mine, did point out that having my head explode would a) allow her to draw on my insurance, which would solve her financial troubles and b) save me the need to shave again.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>I still declined. I don't mind shaving and her financial problems boil down to spending money instead of hoarding it in the Oxo tin under the floorboards.&nbsp; <em>(Damn, now I've given away the secret, I'll have to find a different tin and a new hiding place.)</em></p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Back to the plot.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>There is other news on the Big Bad Media site now. It is officially up and running. Visit and you'll find overviews of the three launch titles and the various formats in which they are to be published, and there's even a short bio of people like me and the other talented authors they're working with.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>You'll find the latest news at <a href="http://www.bigbadmedia.com/2010/08/28/making-a-splash/">http://www.bigbadmedia.com/2010/08/28/making-a-splash/</a> where you will also find links to the various other sites pages.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>Have a read. You'll be glad you did.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> </xml><![endif]--> <!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></p> <p>We don't see much of our old mate Trevor Belshaw these days. That's because he's busy as hell getting Tracy's Hotmail ready for multimedia release through Big Bad Media. I'm technically in the same situation with Voices, but I'm lazier than Trevor which is why I can still find time to annoy you lot.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>For anyone who may be interested, Trevor has just been interviewed on the Don Booker blog <em>(I'm scheduled for the next day or two.)</em></p> <p>&nbsp;</p> <p>You can pick up the full interview <a href="http://fbooker.blogspot.com/2010/08/author-in-zone-trevor-belshaw.html"><span style="font-size: small;">here</span></a> and a fascinating little read it is, too.</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>Well friends, it&rsquo;s that time of year again when we all reflect on what has been and try to figure out what might be.<br /><br />2010 has been its usual mixed bag for me, beginning with a suspected heart attack in January, which ultimately turned out to be nothing worse than some arterial clogging and a pulled muscle. But that silly incident set in motion a chain of events that left me permanently disabled and culminated in early retirement at the beginning of December.<br /><br />It&rsquo;s a shock to the system, I can tell you, but in an effort to maintain my positive and aggressive approach to life, I turned to writing during my 8 months of sick leave, and increased my output to new heights.<br /><br />I put out two new titles during the year. I gave away <em><strong>The Man In Black</strong></em> as an exercise in marketing, and <em><strong>Voices</strong></em>, a project which is about two years old, was finally published in all e-formats about a fortnight ago.<br /><br />Back in March, I suffered a total wipeout of my computer and lost years of work. Serves me right for not backing up, but on the plus side, it did get rid of a lot of deadwood. I now have a plug-in expansion drive and I back up religiously.<br /><br />I discovered other, hitherto hidden, talents I never realised I possessed. The consensus is that I have a strong, clear voice, which, notwithstanding my Yorks/Lancs borders accent, makes it ideal for audio reading. We shall see.<br /><br />On a personal front there have been the usual highs and lows. My private passion for football suffered a total letdown during the World Cup. Not because of England&rsquo;s performance. I&rsquo;ve always considered England to be second echelon in the world game. It was the cynicism the Dutch employed in the final that left me disappointed.<br /><br />During the years, my wife and I reaffirmed our love of the Canary Islands with two visits to Tenerife, but we reinforced our love of this country, too, with a few days in Filey during the spring.<br /><br />Three deaths brought home to me the fragility and brevity of life: in January, I learned of Barbara&rsquo;s death. Two years younger than me, Barbara was a woman I worked with 10 years ago and she had died about 2-3 years ago of cancer. Bob, an old friend from the 60s, was one month older than me and he passed away at the end of November. Then just the other day, December 29th, as if to turn this topsy-turvy year upside down again, I received the news that Geoff, a chap I had the honour of working with for almost 10 years, passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. He was, I think, 64. An old fashioned gentleman the kind you don&rsquo;t meet anymore. RIP all.<br /><br />There were brighter moments, too. My eldest son passed his big 4-0, and is now on the same slide into middle aged lunacy I entered 20 years back. My daughter, aged 41, mother of two teenage girls and wife of a hyperactive husband, demonstrated that the Robinson kamikaze confidence is genetic in nature by starting her degree course. As I said at the time, if she can do that now, just think what she&rsquo;ll achieve by the time she grows up.<br /><br />On Writelink, Facebook and twitter, I&rsquo;ve reaffirmed old friendships and forged new ones and I take as much pleasure from reading your bits and pieces, your snippets of life, as I do from writing my own. Long may these links continue.<br /><br />I don&rsquo;t know what 2011 holds and to be truthful, I don&rsquo;t care. As long as I can enjoy it, I&rsquo;ll take whatever it throws at me. I shall be here, there, all over the web, casting a curmudgeonly eye on the world at large, puncturing the inflated egos and fielding flak from Her Indoors. <br /><br />To close 2010, I would like to thank you all for tuning in over the year, and let me wish you all a happy, prosperous and creative New Year.</p>