<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables /> <w:SnapToGridInCell /> <w:WrapTextWithPunct /> <w:UseAsianBreakRules /> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]> <span class="mceItemObject" classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id=ieooui> </span> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman";} </style> <![endif]--></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>&nbsp;</strong>In my opinion, anyway at all as long as they are British!<span>&nbsp; </span>We produce the safest and most welfare friendly eggs in the world a fact which is being celebrated at the moment as we&rsquo;re bang in the middle of British Egg Week.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Top chefs have donated a range of egg recipes, but here&rsquo;s one you won&rsquo;t find on their websites!<span>&nbsp; </span>I used to make this for my family during our goat keeping days with somewhat mixed results!</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>Sue&rsquo;s Egg Custard</strong></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><em><span style="font-size: small;">Method</span></em></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">First catch your goat!<span>&nbsp; </span>A freshly kidded goat can give a gallon or more milk a day and when you have two of them you can almost bath in it!<span>&nbsp; </span>Unfortunately, they may not be too keen to share it with you if they have a couple of demanding kids bleating at the gate. Bribery usually wins the day though so something tasty in a bucket and a bit of stout rope generally does the trick. </span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>With a bit of luck you&rsquo;ll manage to extract the half pint you&rsquo;ll need.</strong></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">In my opinion the next stage is the most important.<span>&nbsp; </span>Get rid of your kids!<span>&nbsp; </span>No not the Capri kind, that comes later.<span>&nbsp; </span>I mean the ones that are the apple of N &amp; D&rsquo;s eye as long as he doesn&rsquo;t have to look after them!<span>&nbsp; </span></span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 18pt;">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;">As soon as flour and rolling pins made their appearance I&rsquo;d be overwhelmed by four little offers of help which usually reduced the kitchen to something resembling the aftermath of a blizzard.<span>&nbsp; </span>Having learned the hard way, I tried to reserve baking for when they were at school or play school.<span>&nbsp;</span> </span></p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Put plain flour and self-raising flour in you food processor along with a tablespoon of sugar and half a block of Stork margarine.<span>&nbsp; </span>Give it a quick three or four pulses until it looks like fatty bread crumbs and then add a couple of tablespoons of cold water.<span>&nbsp; </span>Spin for about 30 secs and you should have a nice yellowy ball of pastry dough.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;">Now I fully accept that some reading this will gasp in horror at my particular method of pasty making, but fear not, it does work and it&rsquo;s quite delicious!<span>&nbsp; </span>By all means go through that laborious process of weighing and sifting and rubbing little lumps of fat with your finger tips etc, etc. if you must, but I can assure you it isn&rsquo;t necessary! </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;">This recipe was taught to me by my domestic science teacher, Mrs Rice, (I kid you not!).<span>&nbsp; </span>She was four foot nothing with a voice like a fog horn!<span>&nbsp; </span>Many years later I was to hear that voice again, thundering across Tesco car park where she was in full argumentive flow with a Rep whose car she had just backed into! <span>&nbsp;</span><br /><strong>NB:<span>&nbsp; </span>You need 4 oz of SF and 4 oz Plain</strong></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Dress child who is off play school with a cold in wellies, scarf and anorak, dress self in same and search garden for flan dish which you have vague memory of Darling Daughter using to make acorn soup.<span>&nbsp; </span>Find flan dish in toilet area of rabbit hutch and spend twenty minutes scrubbing and soaking in Milton.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>Use wrapping paper from block of Stork margarine to grease slightly medicinal smelling flan dish.</strong> </span></p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Bribe sick child with currents and glace cherries to reveal where he has hidden the rolling pin.<span>&nbsp; </span>Retrieve from coal bucket and threaten to confiscate said cherries and currents if he as much as looks at pastry dough while you scrub rolling pin and sluice with Milton.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Wipe sick child&rsquo;s nose and stand on chair over work top. Divert attention from your culinary master piece with a small piece of pastry of his own.<span>&nbsp; </span>Carefully roll out pastry ball into a nice round sheet slightly bigger than flan dish.<span>&nbsp; </span>Scrape pastry off worktop and roll out again, this time remembering to <strong>dust work top with flour so you can lift without it sticking and falling into holes.</strong></span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Pick up screaming child from floor who has fallen off chair the moment your back was turned. Bribe to stop screaming with currents and cherries and hope health visitor doesn&rsquo;t show up and notice the egg, which didn&rsquo;t come from your layers, swelling on his forehead.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Look for baking beans to scatter on pastry lined flan case to stop pastry rising.<span>&nbsp; </span>Remember catching No 1 son feeding these to goats so use teaspoons instead and cross fingers against metal poisoning.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>Partially bake in a hot oven for about 15 minutes. </strong></span></p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">While flan is baking, heat half a pint of milk to almost boiling after straining through muslin cloth to remove goat hair, dust and the odd current from sick child.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>Beat 3, 4 or 5 eggs together with 3 tablespoons of sugar and add to the milk.<span>&nbsp; </span>(Some people only use the yolks, but I put the whites in as well).</strong></span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Remove flan from oven, tip spoons on draining board and place flan case out of sick child&rsquo;s reach while you answer the phone.</span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>NB.<span>&nbsp; </span>Use crusts of bread instead of spoons which is probably a safer option.<span>&nbsp; </span>See No. 12</strong></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Return to find Nearest and Dearest performing Comanche war dance, hopping and yelling about the kitchen, shaking and sucking his fingers and impressing sick child with extensive knowledge of Anglo-Saxon. <strong>Make mental note not to leave red hot spoons against N &amp; D&rsquo;s coffee cup.</strong></span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: small;">Pour milk mixture into flan case and check spice tubs very carefully for nutmeg.<span>&nbsp; </span>When distracted by pilfering children and theatrical spouses it is very easy to confuse cartons.<span>&nbsp; </span>Take it from me curry flavoured egg custard won&rsquo;t get you to the Bake Off final.<br /><strong>Turn down oven and bake for further 25 - 30 minutes or until custard mix is set. </strong></span> </li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Present to assembled family either cold or slightly warm and wait for enthusiastic praise. This could be a long time coming as kids stare at master piece with fear and trepidation.<span>&nbsp; </span></span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Assure off-spring that milk is not from previous day as unpasturised goats milk quickly goes off with the result it has the most appalling taste.<span>&nbsp; </span>Having suffered many a breakfast cereal laced with day old milk they have a marked aversion to dairy and stare at your wonderfully tantalising egg custard with hostility and suspicion. </span></p> <ol style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="1"> <li class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">Decide to feed next days milk to dogs and make fruit cake. Unfortunately sick child has eaten all the currents and cherries! </span></li> </ol> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">&nbsp;</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;">There&rsquo;s more about <strong><a href="http://folkonthefarm.co.uk/latest-news/british-egg-week">British Egg Week</a></strong> on my <strong><a href="http://www.folkonthefarm.co.uk">Folk On The Farm blog</a></strong>.</span></p>