The twenty-fifth poem from my poetry collection Conception.

[More:]

The Marketplace

I never thought I’d haggle to buy a poo
on the potty, sparkling clean teeth
or get him to eat some fruit.
But bribery is our commerce,
chips and crisps the commonest coins,
ice cream and chocs like ten pound notes,
and I’ve never spent so much!
We bargain for a quick bedtime,
put in bids for toys tidied away,
barter for tea at the table
and place pledges for much, much more besides.
In fact, I’ve even visited the supermarket
to change our monthly salary
into cash from this incredible currency.
So widespread now is its use
that I wonder what it would take
to get hubby to hoover the house.
Would that be one sweet, or two?