Mater

I’m all in favour of free speech, but sometimes I wish people would think before they open their mouths, or worse still, write books on what they profess to be so-called truths.

[More:]

But who am I to talk? I say what I want, don’t I? But even a Would-Be-Protagonist knows where to draw the line. At least I hope so.

Not mentioning any names (besides the fact that I have forgotten the woman’s name, anyway) we settled back to watch an interview with a woman who supposedly talk to angels. It seems ‘angels’ have become a popular spiritual tool. But things can go too far. I’m feeling very uneasy about it all. Anything is possible in the imagination, as we all know, but she declared that it was all true. No flights of the imagination for her, apparently.

She insisted that she had put questions to the angels and had got answers that she was to share with the world. At least that’s how I understood it. And then came the crunch. She read out a couple of questions and answers, and that’s when I lost it. Anna shrunk back as I shouted at the screen, but her alter ego seemed as angry as me - if not as loud. This woman said that the angels had told her that people with disabilities and diseases - and that included children - had themselves chosen their state of health - while they were still in their soul state. So, before they were even born, their souls willed that their bodies must suffer. The woman is barking mad. Does she realise what kind of damage she can cause with such assertions?

It reminds me of the doctrines of the Middle Ages, where suffering and martyrdom was seen to be good and something to strive for - and if it filled the coffers of the Church, so much the better. It was a bad time for organised religion of any kind, as far as I could see (when I made a fleeting visit), and even worse for the ordinary people. You wouldn’t believe the things I saw. I’m glad Anna didn’t place me in that time, I tell you. Even Anna’s Post Modern time and technological age is preferable to that. And I like the fact that medical science can keep pain under control. To a degree, anyway. We had to discuss it, you know - me, Anna and her alter ego - pain, I mean - after the ‘angel’ business.

Why does pain even exist? Anna’s alter ego was a bit cross. In pain, I suppose - so I told her my thoughts on the matter. On a very simple level, of course. I’m not trying to be a know-it-all. Anna tried to say I was, but her alter ego told her to let me speak. So I will.

They both looked horrified when I said that some kinds of pain must be seen to be positive.We are not robots, are we? Okay, you are not robots (Anna pointed out that I’m not ever going to be real. ‘Thank you‘, I said. Not exactly what I wanted to hear). You are living beings and as such, quite fragile. You can get hurt.

‘Tell us something we don’t know.’

‘No need to be flippant.’

‘Sorry. But why do we have to feel pain when we are hurt, in whatever way?’

Is she forgetting that hurt and pain belong together? Anyway, I would have thought the answer to that was quite obvious, even to Anna, but apparently not. Oops! I had to duck a bit quick . Nothing wrong with her left hook, but I’d rather not feel the pain after a blow.
Aha, I see. She was only messing about, so she says. She doesn’t believe in inflicting pain on others. Well, that’s a relief!

I straightened myself up, ready to deliver what I see as the simple truth - at least a simple truth - that pain is a warning sign and a symptom that something is wrong, but I seem to have said something amusing. I’m sure I can hear giggles, yet again. I thought we were having a serious discussion.

‘Yes?’ Anna is definitely laughing at me. ‘I’m waiting.’

‘Well, how would you know that you were in the middle of a heart attack, say - if you didn’t feel any pain?’

‘There might be other symptoms.’

‘Yeah, but I bet they’ll be linked to pain, somehow.’

‘Okay, but how can pain be positive otherwise?’

I despair. I’m sure she’s trying to trip me up. I don’t mean chronic pain (how obvious do I have to be?), but they must be aware of that. Yup, they’re nodding in agreement. At least that’s something. What I’m trying to say, if they didn’t keep on interrupting me, is that sometimes pain stops people in their tracks and makes them step away from danger - and the pain on breaking a bone makes them visit the doctor to have it seen to. Without pain they might not realise that there’s something wrong. Silly little examples, I know, but there you go.

‘So, without pain illness might go unnoticed - and lead to unnecessary early demise?’

‘I suppose so.’ I know, I know. I’m stating the obvious. They know all this.

‘Being as you seem to know it all (I knew they were laughing at me) tell us why pain is pain- in whatever variation and whatever causes it - when it seems pretty obvious that there are many different kinds, both necessary and unnecessary, accidental, caused, warning signs and symptoms of illnesses and diseases.

I shrugged my non-existent shoulders and looked heaven-wards. ‘I don’t know.’ Well, I’m only a Would-Be-Protagonist. How does she think I can possibly know? Oh, because I brought it up? Did I? She’ll blame me for my very existence next.

There’s a lovely sunset outside the hospital window. Perhaps I’ll take my leave for a while (and give myself some time to think).

‘No, you don’t!’

‘You can’t stop me.’

‘Oh yes, I can. Besides I want to talk.’

‘All right then.’ Not that I meant it. I really needed to get away for a bit. I suppose I can do that when Anna’s alter ego drops off to sleep. That’s more frequently that I like at the moment, but it’s the effect of that medicine they keep dripping into her system to cure her ills. I’m glad they’re not sticking needles in me.

‘Are you listening?’

‘Yes.’ Well, I would, if she would only get on with it.

‘About pain. Some people think that they deserve their pain, you know. That it’s God’s doing.’

‘God’s doing? You mean the doing of that infinite power over everything that just is - without being a being?’

Anna rolled her eyes. ‘If you want to put it that way.’

I nodded. Then I shook my head (well, I would have, if I had one). ‘I don’t think that’s right.’

‘So, then you follow the school that all illness and pain is of the devil?’

Has she got a sinister look in her eyes? Is she trying to make me say something I don’t want to say?

‘I don’t follow a school. But if pain is caused, purposely, by one person on another, with intent to cause harm or worse, it’s clearly evil.’

Anna looked at me. ‘Okay, so we’ll agree on that one. But what about chronic pain? People suffering life-long diseases or drawn-out fatal diseases, for instance. Are they being righteously punished for their sins - or the sins of their fathers’ - or is the devil playing games with them?’

I looked from one to the other. ‘Have you taken leave of your senses? Has that medicine addled your brain?’

‘Don’t be cheeky.’

‘Well, forget the devil, and forget punishment, righteous or otherwise. These kinds of pains have nothing to do with any of your suggestions. And you know it.’

‘Do we?’

‘Yes. It’s quite simple really.’ How can I put it? ‘Cause and Effect’, I said.

‘Cause and Effect? Now you’re getting out of your depth. I thought you were going to keep it simple.’

‘I am. I simply meant that there has to be a cause, the effect of which is pain. The one follows the other. And there’s nothing supernatural in it, no punishment from above or the devil playing sly games. ’

‘If you say so.’ Anna looked as though she wanted to continue, but we left it there (and we never even touched on emotional pain!). Anna’s alter ego had to be put back on the drip and swallow some more pills. Painkillers. Ironic, or what?