Writelink Arena

Now I’ve always been overweight. Well, at least that’s what I’ve always thought. No one ever actually said to me ‘Hell Margo, you’re overweight’ I’m a fairly regular size. I can walk, and run on a good day, without getting too breathless. I suppose what I’m saying is that I’m not clinically obese but I’ve always seen myself as being overweight, whatever that may be. Okay my husband did walk out on me for another woman, but she was neither younger nor slimmer than me. Not sure if that makes me feel better or not, but that’s another story.
Anyhow, after he’d left and I was on my own again I decided that perhaps it was time for me to tidy myself up and maybe loose a bit of weight. Not for the purposes of finding another man you realize. No, these days a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit in front of the tele is my idea of heaven. And a hot water bottle is the only thing I want to accompany me to bed.
Where was I? Oh yes. So off I went to one of these health farms with my friend Kath. I say a friend, she’s actually someone I work with, but she was keen like me to smarten herself up and loose some weight, after her husband kept commenting on her love handles and squidgy bits. So, we spent two days having steam baths, laying covered in mud, and having our tense bits massaged, all on a diet of 30 types of lettuce.
The following week Kath and I compared notes. Don’t ask me how but she’d managed to put on weight. I’d lost just a few ounces but I had the bug. I wanted to continue. And continue I did. I walked to work now instead of catching the bus. And I changed my diet drastically. A cup of sugarless tea and a rice cake in front of East Enders didn’t have quite the same appeal but I stayed with it. And slowly over time the weight started dropping off. I went down a whole dress size. I couldn’t afford to buy a whole new wardrobe of clothes but the charity shop did quite well out of me.
When I saw my ex husband in Tesco’s he commented on my appearance, he said his new bit of stuff (my word, not his) was going downhill fast. That pleased me. Not that I’d have him back, wouldn’t go near him with a barge pole but it was nice to have him notice me again.
I even went to the hairdressers and had highlights put in, can you believe it? I had to work extra shifts so I could afford that. So there I was with my new hairstyle, my slimmer figure and my Oska baggy jeans, courtesy of Sue Ryder. And then, I suddenly realised that I still felt overweight. It was a habit I supposed. It was who I was. Margo? - O.k. really, just a bit overweight. That was how I saw myself no matter how I looked. When I did look in the mirror I could recognise the difference and was pleased with what I saw but I was still me and that was o.k. too.
So nowadays? I still eat healthily most of the time but the rice cakes have gone out the window. I no longer walk to work, but I do go for walks at weekends. I’ve got myself a dog now so no excuses. I over indulge at Christmas, who doesn’t? Overall my weight is steady but I don’t think about it so much now. I’m happy with how I look, but more than that, for the first time in my life I am happy with who I am.